OPINION
By M R R
Growing up, many of us have encountered that one friend or family member that we assumed had the best interest for us. To a large extent they do but that interest in our welfare or well-being is as good as how best we remain submissive and subjugated to these individuals.
Their greatest fear is to see you surpass them in anything that life has to offer.
They love it when you keep going to them and asking for help. They love it when you are in desperate situations, and they turn out to be the saving grace that you so badly depend on. The individual will use phrases such as “if nor to min me”. Wollofs will say “hana man ak yalla” etc.
Most times when you go to them for help, they will sit quietly and attentively listening to all your woes and difficulties you face at the particular moment. They have mastered the art of patience. They would never interrupt or tell you they can’t help at that moment because they have to hear every word of your unfortunate ordeal. They will listen to the last breath and immediately following your narration you will hear phrases such as:
1. Why didn’t you tell me yesterday?
2 oh! If only I had known you coming today.
3. You know I would do anything for you but it’s just bad timing etc.
They then tell you that they are sorry they cannot help but will offer to give you a meagre sum of money that won’t even pay for a sandwich. The truth is if you had come yesterday, they would have said you should have come the day before yesterday. They would even make you feel that they are angels in disguise but making you feel that the little pittance given to you is actually all they have, and they have made the ultimate sacrifice to assist you. It’s a lie!
Often times you come across the very brazing friends that would sit you down and tell you all they did for X, Y and Z. They will actually rub it in your face and say to you I did this for her. I did this for him and when you think of it, maybe a quarter of that help can change your situation for good. The truth is they would rather change the lives of strangers than see you succeed and emancipate yourself from asking them for help and be self-sufficient.
Others would only help people who are way better off than you but these are people with large clout or following and they feel that these individuals would speak highly of them, and it will also place them at a particular spot high up the social ladder.
The truth is these friends and or family members are nothing but monitoring spirits. Their foremost agenda is to keep a tab on your progress and ensure it is at a pace that would keep you eternally below them. They act nice and appear to show concern because they want to stay close so that they will continue to monitor your affairs.
Sometimes you have that friend who will introduce you to a man or woman. However, immediately they see you being loved and being happy they suddenly change. The shy ones will just stop speaking to you or suddenly act estranged. You actually wonder and most times be asked yourself what must have gone wrong. The truth is you did nothing wrong. They have seen your progress and happiness, and you are on a path to surpass them. They usually are able to identify this long before you do.
The daring ones will attempt to influence the relationship or marriage. They start to tell you how you should be careful. You hear words like: be careful. I knew this man or woman before you. I introduced you to him. Take your time. He is not truthful. She has a materialist mindset so be careful how you give her gifts etc. Suddenly they start telling you about all the bad things they know about this person yet in the beginning they told you how wonderful and amazing this person is. The truth is they never exacted any good would come out of Nazareth.
They are not difficult to spot out. They don’t appear when there has been a diagnosis. They show up when you are in intensive care and on life support. That’s when you hear them panting and talking loudly over the telephone desperately trying to reach Consultant X and Chief Medical Officer Y. They suddenly are making grand arrangements to send you abroad for medical intervention meanwhile they know you won’t survive that week or at least that’s what they are hoping for.
They are the first to offer to buy the casket or coffin. They fight over who will pay for the grave and foot funeral cost. Others will be calling airlines to buy plane tickets to attend the funeral. Meanwhile, if they had supported you to buy a dose of antibiotics, you would still be alive. Wise up! These are not your friends or family; these are monitoring spirits ensuring that indeed you are dead, and the grave is sealed. They want to witness it all from start to finish.
Stay away from such individuals. As long as God almighty is still God your destiny is in his hands. Map out your own path and not what a friend or family sets down for you. Don’t settle for a parasitic life. Own the bakery and stop begging for bread. Think big and look beyond the ordinary. Dream big and even if you don’t achieve the heights of your dreams, you may fall somewhere in between. Never ever settle for less.
Learn to identify these monitoring spirits disguised as friends and family. They don’t want to see your progress in life their close association with you is simply to have a grasp on your activities. Stay clear of them!!!
May God deliver us from all spirts of oppression monitoring our activities to ensure we remain continually in subjugation and dependence. Amen.
